Michael Jackson was strange, unhealthily strange.

But his music defined my adolescence and college years. My 20th high school reunion is this weekend, but somehow, my spirit is now low and I don’t know if I want to go.

Thriller…Billie Jean…Beat It…Human Nature.

I remember those lonely high school days when I felt so left out. I would come back home and play Ben on the piano and sing,

Ben, the two of us need look no more
We both found what we were looking for
With a friend to call my own
I’ll never be alone
And you my friend will see
You’ve got a friend in me

Ben, you’re always running here and there
(Here and there)
You feel you’re not wanted anywhere
(Anywhere)
If you ever look behind
And don’t like what you find
There’s something you should know
You’ve got a place to go
(You’ve got a place to go)

Never mind that Ben was a rat. It was about the music, soul and feeling.

So, when I think about Michael Jackson, I think about staying up at all hours of the night in college waxing poetic with John, mixed tapes, making bizarre dance moves with my sister at strange Indian dance parties, desperately trying to do the Moondance and convincing others that I did it right, thinking about the sadness and happiness in my life.

Rest in Peace M.J.